Why I hate (Commerce Bank) TD Bank

Commerce TD Bank likes to pride itself on is “WOW” service.  I have gotten my fair share of the WOW treatment.  The kind of treatment where you walk out of there and think WOW – I should really bank elsewhere.  Sometimes I think WOW – they hired that person…. and they didn’t pass the second grade.

I opened my account in November of 2006.   Totally free checking?! No way!  Yep – it’s only free for a year… then you have to have a $100 minimum or they charge you $15 to make themselves feel better.  I didn’t mind that.  What I minded that the customer service person didn’t double check my Social Security number before clicking enter.  There also isn’t a person verifying the number and notifying you of the mistake made.  No, they tell you it’s your fault your social security number is wrong when your direct deposit goes through and you want to withdraw money.  It will give you a short message saying, “Your account is not accessible (asshole).  Please contact the customer service representative at 800-Blow-Me.

Not only is it your fault – it will take 2 weeks to fix because they don’t keep proper paperwork and never follow up.  Everytime I went the person walked off and photocopied my information for their files.  They did this three times.  What the hell happened to the copies.

How did I resolve this issue?  I had to wander back into the bank (during regular bank hours – because no one really needs to work) and talk to everyone and their mother.  It’s not as easy as changing the number back and correcting the problem.  You have to resubmit all your paper work (ID and SSN card) and sign some random form – and then wait for the back office to clear it.  This would have been a great ditterent if I had purchased my SSN on a street corner somewhere.

Once we passed that minuscule hurdle, things were smooth sailing… until today.  Direct Loan Services took the liberty of deducting my loan payment twice.  They had done this two months previous and I called in January and was told the situation was taken care of.  Sadly, it was not the case.  I was charged twice for my loans yet again (this bumps  up my – I don’t have anymore loans party one month to January 28, 2016) . They told me they could not stop the payment, but that my bank should – people do it all the time and there is no fee from the loan services people.  I call Commerce TD. The bank guy is nice and curt.  He tells me the stop cannot be done over the phone and must be processed at the bank for an immediate reimbursement from 9-5 after filing a request form.  Luckily a bank exist a block north from my job.

I head down there and talk to the customer service.  She spends most of her time trying to figure out my problem.  I think “So this is what happened.  My loan automatically withdrew an extra payment from my checking account, and I would like the payment stopped because it has overdrawn the account.”  I don’t think this implies I sent in a check unless people send automatic requests on paper… Regardless she asks me 3 times for the check number.  Each time I say – it’s not a check – it was an automatic withdrawal from the checking account.  She looks on the computer, pulls up my account and opens her eyes wide to say.  “Oh no, did you know you’re overdrawn?”  I almost shit myself – it’s the reason I was there.   After she puts on her thinking cap and realizes that I was charged twice and it has overdrawn my account.

Commerce TD Girl: We usually advice our clients not to charge more than they have in their accounts.

JJRC: Yea, didn’t I mention this was an accident and I don’t charge money I don’t have on my debit card?

Commerce TD Girl: Yea… well ok, so – if you want a stop to the charge – then you have to pay $25.  Then there may be a $15 charge if it clears before the stop is complete.  The stop takes 48 hours and you may see your money on Monday.”

JJRC: What do you mean may be there Monday?! You online service people told me it would be an immediate compensation and no charge was ever mentioned.

Commerce TD Girl: Well, I don’t know what to tell you.  They should really know better. Do you want this done or no?

JJRC: There’s no other option – even though your people didn’t inform me about any of this before I came down here?

Commerce Girl: I already told you – I don’t know what to say about them.  So, what are we doing now?

JJRC: I don’t want to deal with this anymore… you people are ridiculous.

Commerce TD Girl: hmm… Ok – well have a nice…

JJRC: Right.

At this point I stopped listening to her and got up and grabbed my shit – I needed to get back to work.  During lunch I got out of the office and wandered over to the other bank where I have my savings and withdrew more money than I needed.  I wandered back to Commerce TD where some jerk-off named Fields decides he needs to say “Ugh, give me your card and I’ll pull up your account number – though you should have it.”  I could have lost it right then and there – luckily I’m beyond that point.  I laugh at him and his pettiness.

So Fields and his stupid co-worker Nicole need to have a Pow-Wow about how to deal with customers who are beyond annoyed.

Lesson learned here are:

- Do not trust the bank to resolve any of your problems on their own.  They won’t.  They’re too busy being “friendly” and putting out dog bowls with stale water in it to care.

-Don’t assume the bank people are telling you how much anything costs up-front.  They’ll make it your only option and then spring the money on you.

-Don’t allow bank people the pleasure of patronizing you.  Yes, you are the customer and answers like “Umm – I don’t know what they were telling you – but they’re wrong.” Shouldn’t be in their service vocab.

-Chastising bank customers when they’re depositing over $1,000 is an idiotic thing to do. Banks chastise you like they’re doing you a favor by letting you bank with them.

Sigh

JJRC

Memories – from the corners of my mind

People say smells can really take you to a different place.  This is true.  The smell of petroleum quickly takes me back to the gas station in my parents’ hometown.  The Grifo is at the other end of town where my Uncle Pete has a burger stand – the burgers are loaded with mayonnaise, ketchup, mustard, small thin fries, and an egg.  They are delicious and exactly what the truck driver’s crave for the road as they fill up.

The smell of new plastics takes me to my grandparents’ living room on cleaning day.  It’s the smell of the liquid they squeeze on the floor and then mop up.  It’s a strong, chemical odor that lingers in the air for hours on end.  We weren’t allowed to cross the room until it was completely dry, but as children, there was always at least on converse footprint on the floor every week.  Without fail, my sister or I would run across to get to our rooms and ruin the cleaning woman’s hard work.

The same goes with sound actually.  Whenever I hear “”Here I Dreamt I Was an Architect” by the Decemberists, my mind immediately swings into spring.  I get the feeling that there is a cool wind blowing outside with the bright sun shining.  I picture myself on my bed at the old frat house – with my bed by my window (which means it was senior year) listening quietly as I dance between sleep and consciousness.  It is probably the fondest memory I have from Cornell.  There was one day that was perfect.  Classes ended early.  Work was canceled.  I had that moment to listen to music and contemplate anything that came to mind. 

As I listen to the song, I can open my eyes in that room, and see the posters of old New York around me.  I can see my sock has a hole at the small toe.  I saw my textbook on my desk – closed of course.  My desk lamp is the only light in the room.  The room was never particularly sunny, and today the trees provided ample shade.  It takes me back to that one instant where I was content with everything and nothing can touch me.

“Take Five” by Dave Brubeck takes me back to Harvard in 2006.  I had gone there for Spring Break and managed to make a mess of myself.  I remember the temperature being warm, but it was around 32 degrees that night.  We arrived to a party at Cabot House and I got myself drunk to “Take Five” and don’t remember much else.  A good friend of mine had to drag me home. 

The song followed us, and we bought a CD and drove down from Boston to Rhode Island listening to some of it.  I had first heard it in high school, and now I assign it to this short road trip where I blacked out, threw up all over Harvard’s campus, climbed on a car, burst into tears, and got slapped by my friend.  We laughed about it on the car ride to Rhode Island and again on the way to New Jersey.

Smells and Sounds are amazing.  I’m glad to have those memories forever.

JJRC

The Politics of Religion

We are a modern society.  I’m almost sure everyone agrees with that statement.  We are a technologically advanced group of people.  We have a complex monetary system.  We have tools never imagined by earlier peoples (except the Minoans – they had flushing toilets). We can put a man on the moon.  We can call across the globe using our computers.  We can instantly connect with anyone in the world – if they have the proper receivers.  It is truly amazing indeed.  Yet, with all these advances and with our progress as a society – and a world, we cannot get over religion.

Religion is one of the most divisive subject matters anyone can bring up.  It’s not considered polite to discuss religion because the rate of offense is so high.  If I don’t believe in God – someone will have a problem with it and try to fix my broken soul.  Jesus is the Light of the world.  Allah is the Creator and the Father.  Nirvana is th path to self-discovery and ultimate peace.  The messiah will come and rescue the worthy.  It’s fine to have these beliefs, but I have grown to believe that people need to understand and believe in what they understand to be the truth.  No one should be forced into the sheep mentality of your parents.  I was born and raised Catholic, but I do not impose my beliefs on anyone.

My views on abortion and capital punishment are solely my own.  I will be more than happy to discuss this with you, but I will not preach ot you why people should have the ability to choose to keep a pregnancy.  I have my beliefs that people should not be killed by the government for terrible crimes – even if this will make the family of the victims feel better.  Blood on anyone’s hands should be avoided – and Eye for an Eye is barbaric and perpetuates and condones violence.  This is how I feel – no I have not been the victim of a violent crime – and no I have never had to deal with a girl being pregnant with my child.  I can’t tell you how I would react in those situations – but I would hope I remain true to myself and no one else.

With that being said – we have Mike Huckabee vying for the Vice Presidency.  Holy Christ!  The man is a minister from the South that does not believe in Evolution.  Here is where separation of Church and State must step in.  Creationism v. Evolution.  Sorry to say the Evolution is a scientific theory based on facts and experiments – while Creationism is a based on a book that has unknown authors inspired by the Holy Spirit.  It’s clear why some people wouldn’t want Creationist theory taught in schools.  If that’s the case – bring on the Flying Spaghetti Monster – for I have been touched by his noodly appendage.

God doesn’t exist in schools.  God shouldn’t exist in the White House.  The sanctity of anything should remain a church’s business.  Marriage as understood by the state should be between two people.  We have decency laws to keep them from boinking in front of your kids.  You just need to be a better parent to arm those goobers from the facts of life.  People are gay – it’s a fact.  If they were just pretending – wouldn’t they prefer to have sex with women?  If it wasn’t natural – than why can’t we find a psychological cure – or some kind of way to stop this abnormality that is caused by nurture and not nature.    We may have evolved from monkeys.  Sometimes  people need to end a pregnancy – and should be properly educated on their options before doing so. The real fact is that I can choose not to believe in Evolution. I know my option of ending/finishing a pregnancy.  I am not marrying a man – so what do I care if another man marries a man?

Should Mike Huckabee be Vice President with his mentality- no.  Once someone erroneously reported Barack Obama was Muslim.  Did he say – “no, I’m not a Muslim, and if I were it would not change my politics.  My religion is not a matter of discussion.”?  No, he didn’t.  Instead he insisted that he was Christian and said nothing to the defense of Muslims.  His religion is unimportant and should remain out of the media.  Sure, you can win some cheap votes that way, but at what cost?  I guess you have to keep the racists at bay…

So what am I saying?  Religion is not a political platform.  Any mention of religion should be barred from the political sphere.  Candidates shouldn’t be allowed to go to churches.  They shouldn’t preach to the choirs about Christian values.  They should be talking about American values… and Christian values are not American values.

JJRC

The Right to Vote… for Oprah’s Candidate

I stopped by the interns’ desks today and spoke to Michelle.  She was wearing these huge sleeves that were so colorful – it deserved attention.  We discussed random things and then talked about the future, and we came to the conclusion that neither she nor I could handle stupid children.  Stupid children ultimately become stupid teenagers which are most likely to become stupid adults.  The kind of people that make your headache mid-conversation because they just don’t get it.  These people are no different from me or Michelle.  They are on par with us in the eyes of the government – they have the right to bare arms, the right to religion, and the right to vote.

In the matter of voting – I feel it should be mandatory to give everyone non-partisan political lessons.  There are two parties. They stand for different things, but surprisingly – people can be torn between two or three parties.  Yes, people are probably most naturally bi-partisan.  Meanwhile – candidates need to dance like monkeys to get chosen by their parties.  You watch Clinton and Obama dance around on stage.  They avoid breaking eggshells for our pleasure.  At one point they started dragging each other’s names in the mud – holy crap – let’s try and be decent here – you’re American Senators.

Here are those things that I wish would stop:

1 – Staunch Supporters:  We can’t be closed minded here.  All democrats are not liberal hippies.  All republicans are not crazy white supremacists.  Get over it.  I have friends who are from both camps and oddly enough they coexist – until we bring up politics.  Only then are we different.  If I’m recounting the story of that time I passed out in McGraw Hall in my underwear – that’s fine.  If I state that I wanted John Edwards to be president, God help my sorry ass.  What ever happened to lively happy debates?

2 – Supporters on the Street: As I’m walking to work, the last thing I need is a little glossy flyer coming at me.  What really upsets me  is when that glossy piece of paper doesn’t really say anything but “change!”

Obama Girl: Hi – Vote Obama.

JJRC: Umm yea… (After I walked a couple of steps, I looked at the paper and note that it doesn’t cover any issue areas – I walk back to Obama Girl)

JJRC: Hi, do you have a piece of paper on any of the issues being discussed?

OG: Well, I don’t.  I’ll ask my partner.  Oh, she doesn’t either… I can debrief you on his stands on whatever you’re concerned about – if you like!

JJRC: No, I have to get to work.  Thanks.

And when I was coming home – there was a Hillary supporter and an Obama supporter.  They were chatting.

JJRC:  Can I get a piece of paper from each of you?

Hillary: Sure, remember to vote.

Obama Guy: I only have a piece of paper in regards to polling… do you want it?

JJRC: Not really – but I’ll take it anyway.

Clinton is lucky she had actual information on her leaflet.  Sadly Obama failed me twice in one day.

Celebrity Supporters: Hollywood stays quiet all year around – and all of a sudden they decide to come alive every 4 years.  The other day I was watching Oprah Winfrey go on and on about how we need change.  Then she called Stevie Wonder on stage with Michelle Obama.  Stevie Wonder fell off the stairs… poor guy.  It must have been a rough fall too because his glasses flew off his face.  Why? I don’t really care who you’re voting for Oprah.  You should keep that to yourself.  Honestly, somehow celebrities really cheapen the whole thing.  Unless the celebrity is part of a major cause and/or representing a foundation, they shouldn’t be allowed any airtime for either candidate.  It doesn’t make sense.

Here’s where we go back to the stupid people in the world.  Oprah can sway their votes.  The faceless masses who drool over every book she recommends.  They will vote for Obama.  The stupid people who make claims they can’t back up about presidential candidates and are crushed in an argument by their friends.  They will be swayed.  The people who read too much into glossy paper and small factoids.  They will be swayed.  It’s like high school only the Prom King and Queen get to rule the world.

JJRC